When I first heard this concept from a mentor of mine about 5 years ago, well, to say I was affronted and thought she was full of shit would be an understatement.
My initial thoughts were things like:
“How the fuck am I responsible when I was on the receiving end of xyz and their xyz?!”
And, to be completely honest with you it took me another 6 months, maybe more, before the penny dropped.
I mean, really dropped.
Before I really understood the concept behind what she was saying.
Before I fully grasped the reality and the truth of her words.
Before I was able to see the raw power in what she was asking me to do.
But when it did it was almost as though a big, bright light was shining on the super fucking obvious fact that she was so very right!!
I’ll come back to this in a bit but first…
LET ME TELL YOU A STORY
This morning at my local cafe, I was speaking with one of the staff about, let’s just say, stuff (read: blame, shame, tolerance, etc) and she mentioned to me that her child’s father was doing things like:
Projecting his negativity on to her.
Poor management of her business causing it to fold.
Being abusive and manipulative.
Taking her 4×4 with her young daughter inside and crashing it.
There were many things and many details but it’s not at all my place to go there.
But.
Instead of starting a pity party with her.
Instead of cooing ‘poor baby, how dare he’.
Instead of letting her stay stuck in this pattern.
Because seriously, she doesn’t need any fucking more of that in her life. And if I were to do that I’d not be honouring or serving her in the way I was born to.
Doing so would mean that I’d not be living my truth or my purpose. And, well, that’s just not even possible for me.
So.
Instead.
I mentioned that no matter what he is doing that is affecting her… She is allowing it to happen.
And that’s the truth.
For all of us.
Don’t get me wrong.
I’m not claiming that he didn’t do those things.
I’m not saying she’s making that shit up.
But.
INSTEAD OF CREATING A STORY THAT: ‘IT’S ALL HIS FAULT…
What if you were to look at the ‘stuff’ that’s happening and you were able to see where you were responsible for allowing it to happen.
Where you were even giving the perpetrator permission to do and/or continue to do those things to you.
It’s a bold concept.
I know.
Which is exactly why I was so affronted when my coach all those years ago presented it to me.
But sweet gorgeous love.
You see.
When you are able to see…
When you are able to accept…
When you are able to recognise…
Where you are not living in your truth.
Where you are not respecting yourself.
Where you are not valuing yourself.
Where you are not loving yourself.
And.
Where you are not appreciating your awesomeness and badassery.
Where you are not setting solid boundaries (and sticking to them).
Where you are not honouring yourself and your personal values.
Where you are not setting the foundations that allow you to be treated as the Queen that you were born to be.
Well.
THAT’S WHEN YOU ARE TRULY SERVING YOURSELF.
Being able to accept responsibility for the part you have or are playing in a situation, in a relationship, in a ‘thing’, that is when you put yourself in a position of power.
And that.
Well, my love.
That is one of the best ways you can ever serve yourself.
Because you see.
The part someone else is playing is quite irrelevant in the grand scheme of things.
That is something you do not have the power to change.
That is something you do not necessarily have the power to influence.
That is something you do not have the power to control.
However.
The part you are playing in ‘a thing’, well, that you do:
Have the power to influence.
Have the power to change.
Have the power to control.
And when you look at ‘things’ from that perspective…
You begin to see things differently.
You begin to feel things differently.
You begin to think about things differently.
When that happens, you start putting into place a powerhouse of building blocks that enable you to:
Grow
Expand
Love
Empower
YOURSELF!
It’s the internal work.
That’s the most powerful.
That’s the biggest game-changer.
Because my love.
When you’re doing the blaming.
When you’re not being accountable.
You’re making it all about them.
You’re giving them all the power.
You’re diminishing yourself.
You’re making it all about them.
Instead of making it all about you.
Because.
It should always be about you.
Every-fucking-thing.
Should always be about you.
You need to put yourself first.
Above all others.
You need to raise yourself up.
Higher than ever before.
And, truthfully.
BLAMING
Holding others responsible.
Not being accountable.
That’s all the stuff of the ordinary people.
That’s all the stuff of the victim.
That’s all the stuff of the narrow-minded.
It’s the small people who never see it.
It’s the small people who never accept it.
It’s the small people who never address it.
It’s the small people who never change it.
It’s the small people who never work through it.
And.
That stuff.
Well.
That’s the stuff that keeps you playing a smaller game than you were born to play.
That’s the stuff that keeps you feeling less than, not enough, insignificant, unloved, unworthy, undeserving.
That’s the stuff that keeps you sad, isolated, miserable and existing your way through life.
That’s the stuff that keeps you from tapping into your desires, your passions and your purpose.
That is the stuff that keeps you stuck in a shitty pattern of repeating suffering, pain and heartache.
That’s the stuff that keeps you stuck in comfortable discomfort and stops you from expanding and growing into the badass that you were born to be.
And honestly gorgeous one.
You are so much better and so much more deserving than that.
And you know it.
Just like you also know that that is the stuff that you need to drop like hot fucking coals.
Right here.
Right now.
So that you can honour yourself.
So that you can love yourself.
So that you can respect yourself.
So that you can step up.
So that you can rise.
So that you can fully own your internal power.
And.
So you can claim your throne and your crown.
Because my love.
You are the fucking Queen!
Love, Truth & Badassery,
Remember… You Have One Life. Hit The Fuckin’ Button!
Lauz xx
Mindset & Online Empire Creation Mentor
P.S. GORGEOUS BADASS. I BELIEVE ENTREPRENEURSHIP IS ALL ABOUT TAKING RISKS
It’s about having faith in the uncertainty of things.
It’s about not knowing what’s going to happen next.
It’s about trusting that everything will work out.
It’s about KNOWING ALL OF THAT^ and going all-the-fucking-way-in and pursuing your dreams anyway.
And something that most people will deny, or at least not hold a conversation about.
Entrepreneurship can be a very, very dark and lonely place.
And it seldom works out for you when you try to do everything yourself. When you choose to go it alone.
THERE’S ONLY ONE WAY TO EXPERIENCE MASSIVE SUCCESS
And that is to surround yourself with real, true, badass leaders. Female leaders!
I don’t just mean women who do similar things.
I don’t just mean women who think like you do.
I don’t just mean women who are your friends.
I don’t just mean women who are your peers.
I don’t just mean women who are online.
What I do mean is:
That you must surround yourself with real, raw, truthful, authentic, unapologetic, powerful, rebellious, game-changing, creative and visionary women who are here to live their lives full out, on purpose, to experience massive success and who won’t let any-fucking-thing get in their way.
Because you know how important all of those things are.
Knowledge
Badassery
Strength
Wisdom
Power
Ass-kicking
Accountability
Fierce love
Feminine energy
Nurturing
Without THAT^ you simply CANNOT have it fucking all.
And.
NOT having it fucking all IS not an option for you gorgeous one.
Which is precisely why I decided to create my own league of absofuckinglutely extra-ordinary badass leaders.
I have created an elite INNER CIRCLE for women who are:
Done talking
Done wishing
Done hoping
Done praying
Done dreaming
Women who are READY to start HAVING IT FUCKING ALL.
Women who are READY to start FUCKING LIVING IT.
Women who are READY to start OWNING THEIR POWER.
Women who are READY to start CREATING THEIR IDEAL REALITY.
Women who are READY to start enjoying MULTIPLE 5 FIGURE MONTHS.
Alrighty.
Now.
This isn’t for everyone. And that’s how it’s meant to be ‘cos I don’t want to work with everyone.
I choose to only work with the:
Rebels
Misfits
Weirdos
Loners
Outcasts
Rule-breakers
Game-changers
Creatives
Visionaries
Impassioned
Fierce
Committed
Risk takers
Action takers
Go-getters
I choose to only work with women who are willing to cut through the bullshit and rise above the rest.
To become the elite.
Those who will be the best of the best.
Women who are READY to STAND OUT FROM THE CROWD and become the expert, the fucking leader.
Women who are READY to be THE FUCKING BADASS you were born to be.
Women who are READY to start BEING THE FUCKING QUEEN they have always wanted to be.
And.
Women who are READY to MAKE BIG ASSED BANK to back it all up!
And gorgeous one.
I believe that is you.
If you agree with me AND you are ready to be a part of a supportive community of women exactly like that…
Send me a PRIVATE MESSAGE to chat and see if you’re a fit for my brand new private 12 month mentorship, the INNER CIRCLE OF BADASSERY!
